Doctor's Orders

"Upper-Respiratory Infection," declares my new doctor (of Mediterranean decent, so roll your r's and articulate every "t" sound; it's important to get the full flavor of the post.)

Okay, thank you. I'll get these prescriptions filled and go home for a nap. But wait! I wonder if you might be kind enough to do me a little favor??

Yes? What is it?

Do you know what a blog is?

Hmm?

A blog. You know-- it's on the Internet; kind of like an on-line journal. People read it every day and comment?

So, it is like this 'chatting' on the Internet??

No, not exactly. But sort of. I was thinking it would be kind of funny; you know, humorous? If you could just write me a note (a "doctor's excuse"), as kind of a joke? You could take this pad of paper, and say something like, "Please excuse Mrs.4444 from blogging this weekend. She has an upper respiratory infection."

[He looks at me with eyebrows furrowed.] What do you want me to do?

Here (I put the pad in front of him.) Just write a note that says "Please excuse...."

And you want me to sign my name?

Yes. That's perfect. Thank you very much!
Can you say "Heelarrious?"