Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Reflections on Motherhood

On 9-22-90, sixth months after Mr.4444 and I got married, I started writing a journal for the kids I hoped to have one day. I'll be honest and just tell you it was born out of a bizarre and unexplainable fear that I might one day die and leave my kids motherless. I wanted them to know everything I wanted to teach them, just in case, so I wrote. And yes, I did start the journal two years before Kyle was even born. It's crazy; I'm full aware of that, but I'm glad I did it. I've obviously lived long enough to raise my kids most of the way. The other bonus is that they have that journal, which today is more than 180 typed pages long.

The journal (which I later split in two, one for each kid) is filled with my thoughts, feelings, and observations about being my kids' mom, and my take on current events in the world, but it's also filled with memories: silly, cute, scary events that I chronicled for them, memories of people they will never know, and milestones. Memories that today may be fuzzy around the edges for them will come to life when they read about them in those journals; they are treasures.

Since I've had Half-Past Kissin' Time, my journal entries are much farther in between, but every now and then, I add a personal message to each one, and sometimes (like tonight), I poke around for stuff to put here. Here's the gem I offer tonight (Thanks, Kyle!)

5/1/8/94 [Kyle was just two years old.]

There is a possibility that I may be pregnant. We aren’t sure yet, but a little story illustrates your level of understanding at your age. I asked you, “Kyle, would you like to have a baby brother?” You replied, “Yes.” I asked, “How would you like a baby sister?” You exclaimed, “Yes!” I said, “You would? That’s great.” You became excited and kept saying, “Yes! baby sister, baby sister!” Of course, I was charmed that you would be so enthusiastic about our growing family. However, you soon became quite frustrated and upset, pointing to the kitchen and crying, “Want baby sister! Baby sister!” It was then that I realized that you thought “baby sister” was a type of snack!! I had to laugh out loud, but you were quite upset. It took some time for me to explain, and you managed to calm down after I did get a snack for you. That’s a story I won’t forget.


Amused? Oh, believe me, there's plenty more where that came from :)

24 comments:

  1. I wish I'd have done something like that! I think it's a great idea, and only slightly crazy. ;o)

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  2. Life is so much better than fiction. You can't make up moments as funny and cute as that one.

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  3. SO cute! I started out keeping a journal for Boy, but it's fallen off in the last few months. Instead I set up an e-mail address for him, and I e-mail stories and musings to it for him to read someday. I share your bizarre and unexplainable fears :-)

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  4. AUGH! I wish I kept a journal! That's such a great idea, but it's like 22 years too late. Thanks a lot.

    I don't remember my kids reactions to the pregnancy of their siblings, but I do have a little note from my older son informing me he would NOT be a babysitter for the soon-to-arrive baby. Ha! Joke was on him - they're best friends.

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  5. What a wonderful idea! Your kiddo will treasure these and pass them down to the grandchildren. Baby sister, reminds me of Chris when we told him we were adding to our family. The kid insisted he was going to have a baby sister, period. He even had a swing on his swing-set that nobody else could use 'cause it was for his baby sister, period.

    It was quite a relief when we brought the boy home a baby girl to throw upon his chubby little legs to hug.

    Thanks for taking us down memory lane and the story of how Kyle almost became a cannibal. LOL!

    Now for the snack of the day.....Heeeheeehe. Have a terrific one dear one. :o)

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  6. Now THAT's a committment! Diligently "typing" thoughts that will be unread for years.

    Thats a wonderful thing to do!

    My mother passed away before I came to know her as an adult. I'd have loved something like that. God Bless you!

    You OK in my book!

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  7. Annie has Baby Books for all three boys - and each of the Books has notes within relative to that particular child. I'm glad she took the time to do it - and so are the boys.

    Well done you.

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  8. I think that is a sweet idea! My friend writes in her kids' journals now that they are older. What a great way to keep the communication going. I can tell you are a fabulous mom!

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  9. And if you had gotten it on video, you'd be at LEAST $10K richer! That's classic!!

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  10. I love that!
    I have kept a little book of some of the funny things the girls said while growing up. They are great to look at!

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  11. That is so sweet! I guess baby sisters aren't as yummy as a cookie, but they sure do last longer and make for sweeter memories!

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  12. What a cute story! I've done kind of the same thing; I've written letters to the kids on every birthday...not sure yet when I'll give it to them. Probably a long time from now since Joshua only has four and Ella has one. Still, love the journal idea too! Kind of wishing I'd thought of that one...;)

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  13. Sweet boy.

    The reason I started blogging was to have a journal for my boys...it's become more than that, but that was the orignial intent.

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  14. LOL...oh Barb that was so precious...and i wish I had done a better job of chronicling or journaling...

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  15. I have written in journals all my life, but never specifically to or about my children. Strangely enough the journal entries were few and far between when the girls were younger. I'm sorry for that now.

    The memories of that time are written on my heart, though.

    Thanks for sharing and thanks to Kyle, too!

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  16. What a great story!

    The journal for your kids is a great gift. My mother gave me one that she wrote as an adult. It's my most cherished gift.

    xo

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  17. What a great thing to have done. My Mom didn't write anything when I was a kid, but she writes lovely things to me now.

    I can't wait to see more from that journal if this is just a preview!

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  18. That journal of yours truly is a precious treasure for your kids. What a wonderful thing to do do!

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  19. Well, baby sisters to have tasty toes!

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  20. LOVE it. The things that come from the mouths of babes.... I giggled. I love that you did this journal. My blog is that journal for the wee ones... albeit more public, but that was my impetus in starting it. I hope they enjoy it someday.

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  21. Wish I would have done that! But, I do have tons of journals they could go through and fight over, ha ha. My life was so exciting. :0 I kept a legal size page every day for over 10 years, then after 9/11 I felt no motivation, but I do have a few prayer journals, some with neat answers to prayers, and there is now a greatful journal. :)

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  22. What a wonderful gift to give your children.

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  23. my blog is my journal...complete with pics and video! :-)

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