Wednesday, February 6, 2008

My Glamorous Past

Way back in the day, like 25 years ago (yikes!), I did some modeling, and I stumbled upon the proof last weekend,in the basement (finally putting my Christmas decorations where they belong.) As a 3rd or 4th stringer, I wasn't in the Sunday circulars every week, but I do have enough evidence to prove that I worked a bunch. Since I also went to school full time and had two other jobs, modeling was not my "bread and butter," so-to-speak, but it did help pay the bills.

Modeling is very interesting, to say the least, and believe it or not, it's hard work sometimes. Yes, most of the time, I just had to stand correctly and look really excited and happy (See photo below. Can you guess which one is me?).

However, one summer, I took a job that required me to get up at 4:00am and to be at a marina in a bikini at 5am sharp. Now, summer mornings in Wisconsin are okay, but at 5:00am, in a bikini, going 35 mph on a gigantic Cruiser is not exactly tropical in temperature, especially on the bay of Lake Michigan. Add to that the expectation that I be smiling broadly, my arm around my captain "husband," even as my teeth literally chattered, and you have a job I never signed up for again (even though I got paid $75 for the morning.)

By far, my most interesting, difficult job as a model involved no fashionable clothing, no manicured nails, and minimal make-up. They just told me to show up in a black leotard and tights for a shoot at a medical building. Here's my most glamorous shot (of several) from that job:

That's me; the "patient." Charming, huh?

Of course, you're thinking, "Wow! So glamorous! I had no idea that modeling was so exciting! Now, that takes talent!" What you don't see in that happy-go-lucky crotch-shot is that I spent more than three hours (yes, hours) in those stirrups, and I required help to lift myself out of them when I finally got a break. Who knew that taking photos of surgical drapes was so technical?! And who knew that lying still for hours would be so grueling? (I was really sore the next day!)

The Girl, upon seeing this photo said, "Mom, that's sick!." Sick or not, I got paid $150 for five hours, so I'm not going to complain. And the fact that I earned it on my back, with my legs spread is no reflection on my character, right?


  1. Hilarious!! And I love the 80s modeling shot. I think I had a pair (or two) of those shiny striped shorts. EEK! ;)

  2. OMG! Hilarious! Totally love the hot pink shorts and big hair! The medical procedure shot is way funny. Actually, your comment about getting paid to spread your legs was even funnier. Thanks for sharing!

  3. Very funny!! Thanks for sharing. I only saw the ads in the newspaper long ago. I always new my sister had hidden talents:)

  4. ok are you on the left or the middle?
    you have to tell us!

    and the last modeling pic you posted took me a little off guard.
    wow and ouch all at the same time!


  5. Rhonda, the hard work was the lying/laying down part! That's me in the stirrups! :)

  6. hahahaha. I love the surgery photo. Also, the hair in the first one is out of control.

  7. At least the spreading your legs job was a different one than the bikini job, right? ;)


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