Thursday, June 9, 2011

Gone Too Soon

C was the life of the party; she had a quick wit and a hearty laugh. She had a way of making everyone she met feel special and appreciated. Kendall remembers naming her Barbie dolls after C and her twin sister; she admired them both. C was awesome. Sadly, she was also an alcoholic, and we're going to her funeral today. She was 44 years old.

C was one of four cousins Mr.4444 has. He loved her very, very much and had reached out to her numerous times in the last several years. Unfortunately, alcoholism had caused spotty reception on C's end. I haven't seen C in a long time, so I have the luxury of remembering her as a beautiful, vivacious woman who was a lot of fun and very loving. I trust that her family will be able to do the same, though they've been through a lot.

Whether or not you believe that alcoholism is a disease or simply an addiction, you can't argue with the fact that it's devastatingly powerful and destructive. C didn't die from a fall or from some late-night car wreck; she died simply because her body couldn't take it any more. Forty-four years old.

My point in posting this is to shake anyone up to the fact that perfectly wonderful, healthy people can die from the effects of alcoholism, and it doesn't have to take a typical lifetime. I know that, as drugs go, it probably seems like the least of all the evils, but alcoholism's power is great and its effects devastating for a family.

If you are a recovering alcoholic, please accept a big hug from me; you have given yourself and your family a priceless gift. If you are an alcoholic, I encourage you to get some help. It will probably be the hardest thing you ever did, but no harder than what your family will face if you don't.

Not sure if you're an alcoholic or not? Take this screening.


  1. I am so so sorry for your loss.

    Your post is so powerful.

    Hate to ask, but this post and the last few are not coming up on my blogger dashboard, do you think there is something wrong?

    Hugs to you today.

  2. I lost a childhood friend to alcoholism. He was about 35 at the time. I had pretty much lost contact with him over his last 15 years. Very sad and for those who don't suffer it, the whole thing seems like a waste of a life. I consider it a disease and certainly some drugs produce damage faster, alcohol is still a drug. There are many traps on this road of life that throw us over the edge. Life is dangerous I guess. All the best to you and your extended family.

    Oh just as Melani noted - the last feed (google reader one) I have of your blog is the last SS post.

  3. I'm sorry for your family's loss. Alcoholism is a very tough to fight with family members and friends. Its hard to understand the issues and make the effected person see the right path.

  4. Yes, Melanie. Something IS wrong. I'm trying to figure it out. Thanks.

    Lisleman--I know what you mean. C did, too; she knew she had "wasted" her life and felt powerless about it. Hard to imagine.


  5. I know exactly how horrific alcoholism is -- my uncle John drank himself into diabetes by age 30. Due to his drinking he contracted Hepatitis, cirrhosis and eventually brain damage from a diabetic coma. He died at 55 in a nursing home in upstate NY unable to recognize any of us.

    I wish there was something any one of us could do to help someone with this addiction...or any addiction. I'm so sorry for your loss. It's a painful thing.

  6. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    I appreciate your post and agree whole-heartedly that alcoholism is devastating to a family. As the child of an alcoholic who estranged from her mother 12 years ago because of it, the ramifications of alcoholism are so deep and long lasting that you never quite know when/if you're done dealing with the issues it creates.

    I actually think alcohol is worse than a lot of other drugs. People think there's nothing wrong with it because it isn't illegal - so you can drink as much as you want, right? If only we all knew how wrong that is.


  7. So sorry to hear about C *hugs* to all the family.

    Adam's mum (my MIL) is an alcoholic, but things only got bad for her after her husband died about 6 years ago. She went from being a fairly active, reasonably healthy 65 year old to extremely frail, lost a lot of weight, got liver damage and alcohol induced dementia and now really needs to move out of her home of nearly 50 years and into a dementia ward. She's sober most of the time now though, but only because she doesn't have the cognitive capacity to take herself shopping any more.

  8. It is a painful and true reminder. I, too, have seen the ravages of alcoholism. God bless "C" and all who loved her.


  9. Wow, this is just terrible. I'm so sorry.


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